rest assured

Pain is often avoidant.
Swept under the rug.
Minimalized.
Candy-coated.
When it is discussed openly, it becomes an intellectual conversation.
A conversation of the past.
It's as though we become strong when we discuss our weaknesses. We don't absorb them or allow them into our sense of identity. Instead, we place these negative emotions in the past tense. It's easier to claim those "past" painful experiences because it assumes that now, in the present, we are strong and are not in pain. We are no longer those weak individuals that experienced pain.

However, when I do, on occasion, decide to allow another into my pain, I find something unexpected.

Something beautiful, and yet terrifying.
Something warm and inviting, while at the same time humbling.
A sigh of relief in the midst of terror.
A hope for something new.
I find Grace.


And during this period of humility, His grace is sufficient.
Not because I am making it sufficient for me.
Not because it should be sufficient.
But because it is.
Currently.
Always.
Forever.
I am free to be in the midst of pain.
I am free to experience it without manipulating it.
Without cleaning it up.
Without justifying it.

I can just be...... fully embraced in the grace of God.
At rest.
At peace.
Free.